Preheat oven to 350°F. Line a 12-cup muffin tin with paper liners and lightly spray the liners with non-stick spray (optional).
In a microwave-safe bowl, combine 3 tablespoons coconut or canola oil, 1 stick (8 tablespoons) unsalted butter (melted and slightly cooled), and 1/2 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips. Microwave in 30-second increments, stirring between each increment, until fully melted and smooth. Alternatively, melt over very low heat on the stovetop. Set aside to cool slightly.
In a medium bowl, whisk together 3/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour (not packed), 1/2 teaspoon baking soda, 1 teaspoon baking powder, 1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder, and 1/2 teaspoon salt until evenly combined. Set aside.
In a large bowl, whisk 2 large eggs plus 1 large egg yolk, 1 cup granulated sugar, and 1 teaspoon vanilla until smooth.
Add the cooled chocolate mixture to the egg mixture and whisk until smooth.
Add half of the dry ingredient mixture to the wet mixture and stir until just combined. Add half of the 1/2 cup full-fat sour cream and stir until just combined. Repeat with the remaining dry mixture and the remaining sour cream, stirring only until just combined each time.
Quickly stir in 1/2 cup hot coffee or hot water until evenly combined. Do not overmix.
Divide the batter among the 12 prepared liners, filling each about 3/4 full. Bake for 16–18 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. Transfer cupcakes to a wire rack and cool completely before stuffing and frosting.
While the cupcakes cool, make the raspberry puree: in a small saucepan combine 1 1/4 cups frozen (or fresh) raspberries and 2 tablespoons lemon juice. Bring to a simmer over medium heat, stirring and breaking up the berries, until the mixture thickens and can coat a spoon (it will resemble jam). You should end up with about 1/4 cup raspberry puree. Remove from heat and cool completely.
When cupcakes are completely cool, use a small sharp knife to cut a small cavity from the center of each cupcake and reserve the removed pieces. Divide 1/4 cup Nutella evenly among the 12 cupcakes and spoon or pipe about 1 teaspoon Nutella into each cavity. Replace each reserved cake piece to cover the filling.
Make the raspberry frosting: place 2 sticks (8 ounces) very soft unsalted butter in a large bowl or the bowl of a stand mixer. Beat on medium-high until smooth, about 2 minutes. Add the cooled raspberry puree and beat until combined, about 1 minute.
With the mixer on low speed, add 3 1/2 cups sifted confectioners' sugar one cup at a time, incorporating between additions. Add 1 tablespoon heavy cream and 1/2 teaspoon salt. Increase mixer speed to high and beat for 2 minutes, until the frosting is thick and fluffy. (If needed, you may adjust texture very slightly using the parenthetical options listed with the ingredients.)
Frost the filled cupcakes as desired and top with up to 1/4 cup fresh raspberries for decoration, if using.